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The worst Scotsch single malts in the world |
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...59 Aberfeldy 13yo 1978/1992 (43%, Master of Malt) |
Even at this tender age this teenage Aberfeldy seems bored & tired. |
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...59 Glentromie 12yo (40%, OB, Speyside Distillery) |
A small disaster in your glass from the infamous Speyside distillery. |
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...58 Glen Albyn 25yo 1979/'05 (56%, DT Rarest, C#3958) |
Duncan Taylor 'Rarest of the Rare'. Taste it and you'll know why... |
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...58 Glenesk 1984/1997 (40%, Connoisseur's Choice) |
If only this had the bland 'house style' of other Connoisseur's Choices. |
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...58 Tamnavulin 12yo (40%, OB, Bottled + 1999) |
Shallow and all greased up. Light as the wind, gone in 60 seconds. |
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...57 Deanston 12yo (40%, OB, Bottled + 2000) |
Newsflash: Underachiever discovers middle of road. |
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...57 Kinclaith 20yo (46%, Cadenhead's, Bottled 1990's) |
Ever wondered why they closed down Kinclaith? |
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...57 Tullibardine 1988 (46%, OB, +/- 2004) |
In the 'oily' side of the spectrum. Hardly my favourite profile. |
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...56 Bruichladdich 1989/'02 Valinch (58.5%, OB, Paris) |
This is a love-it-or-hate-it whisky. Serge loved it. |
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...56 Edradour NAS 'Batch #1' (52,6%, Signatory, Tokaji) |
August 2006 was a black month for Edradour... |
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...56 Glen Albyn 15yo 1980/1996 (43%, Signatory) |
The casks with the numbers 2950 and 2951 were haunted... |
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...55 Bowmore NAS 'Darkest' (43%, OB, Bottled + 1999) |
FWP Alert!!! Excuse my French... |
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...55 Knockando 1979/1994 (43%, OB) |
Proof that not all 'antiques' are worth hunting down. |
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...55 Tobermory NAS (40%, OB, Bottled + 1997) |
There's that slippery oil problem again. |
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...54 Tobermory 10yo (40%, OB, Bottled + 2002) |
Is this the best they can do after 10 years? |
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...53 Speyside 10yo (43%, OB, Bottled + 2003) |
They failed to meet my low expactations with this one. |
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...53 Tullibardine 13yo 1989/2003 (59.8%, Cadenhead's) |
Even at cask strength I'm not getting excited. |
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...52 Allt-A-Bhainne 18yo '80/'99 (43%, SigV., C#19000) |
A small disaster in the cask. What went wrong? |
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...51 Edradour 21yo 1968/1990 (46%, Signatory) |
Casks #1990-1994 were used for this particular bottling. |
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...51 Famous Grouse 'VMW' 1992/2004 (40%, OB) |
I wonder what malt dragged this vatting down so much. |
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...51 Loch Lomond NAS (40%, OB, Bottled + 1999) |
I'm just two points away from actively disliking it. |
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...50 Cu Dhub (40%, OB, Speyside Dist., Bottled + 2003) |
A.k.a. the illegitimate bastard son of Loch Dhu. |
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...50 Glencraig 1968 (40%, G&M Conn. Ch., Old Map) |
Even the best of company can't make this enjoyable. |
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...49 Bowmore 35yo 1968/'03 (42.05%, Peerless, C#1424) |
A whisky tasting of aspirin - not my kind of 'medicine'. |
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...47 Ardnave 10yo (40%, Malts of Distinction, Gall & Gall) |
Were they hoping people would mistake it for Ardbeg? |
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...47 Bruichladdich 12yo 1991 (46%, Whisky Galore, 5cl) |
Dead & gone. Fortunately this was only a 5cl sample. |
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...47 Famous Grouse 12yo Vatted Malt (40%, OB, +/- 2007) |
No threat to real single malts, but a nice alternative for cheap blends. |
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...45 Dailuaine 1971/1992 (40%, G&M Connoisseurs Ch.) |
Dailuaine had some great casks. This wasn't one of them... |
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...45 Millburn 1974/'98 (40%, G&M Connoisseurs Choice) |
Hardly the choice of any self respecting 'connoisseur'. |
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...44 Drumguish NAS (40%, OB, Bottled + 2001) |
Being better than its 90's sibling doesn't mean it's good. |
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...44 Inchgower 12yo 'De Luxe' (70 Proof, OB, 1980's?) |
Other maniacs were 'unimpressed' - I nearly choked. |
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...44 Old Rhosdhu 5yo (40%, OB, Bottled + 1998) |
Loch Lomond by any other name is still Loch Lomond. |
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...40 Drumguish NAS (40%, OB, Bottled + 1995) |
The single malt I loved to hate during the 1990's. |
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...40 Edradour 10yo (40%, OB, Pernod, Bottled + 2001) |
Bottled shortly before Andrew Symington took over. |
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...35 Edradour 10yo Distillery Edition (43%, OB, + 2001) |
Bottled shortly before Andrew Symington took over. |
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...32 Craiglodge 2001/2005 (45%, OB, Cask #223) |
Setting a new standard for sub-standard single malts. |
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...28 Inchmoan 2001/2005 (45%, OB, Cask #53) |
I foolishly decided to give Loch Lomond one last chance. |
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...20 Glen Mhor 15yo (40%, Gordon & MacPhail, IG/DGE) |
Foul! By far the worst independent bottling I ever tried. |
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...14 Loch Dhu 10yo (40%, OB, 20cl, Bottled + 1999) |
I prefer the 20cl bottle because there's less to hate. |
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...11 Loch Dhu 10yo (40%, OB, 70cl, Bottled + 2000) |
Aqua Crematoria. The only malt I ever threw down the sink. |
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As you can see, there are only a few 'avoidable' single malts produced in Scotland.
Better yet, most malts on this list ended up in the 'dangerzone' between 50 and 60 points where I still found enough enjoyable
elements to balance out the 'faults' and undesirable characteristics. On my purely personal scale, 50 points is the tipping point of the scale between enjoyable and... erm... non-enjoyable. Even though there's a slim chance you might run
into some of the bottlings at the very bottom of the list (Loch Dhu comes to mind), it's best to be prepared. You won't be able to say I didn't warn you. If you do encounter one of the malts on the Shit List: don't panic
- just walk away...
Obviously these are exceptions; most single malts score in the 70's and 80's.
But there are other types of whisky as well; blends and vatted malts, for instance.
After I published a list of the Worst Whiskies In The World in 1998 I received many
responses by visitors and published them as 'Public Warnings' on a seperate page.
Over the years the focus of the site drifted more and more towards single malts,
so I've removed this 'Public Warnings' page (with mostly blends) a while ago.
However, here are a few of the highlights I've rescued from the 'Public Warnings' page;
Lous Perlman On Four Roses: 'The Roadkill of Alcoholic beverages.'
Mike Avery on Glen Eden: 'If it were a person it would be a red-headed stepchild you'd have to beat...'
Robert Montgomery on House of Stuart: 'The best thing about it is that the plastic bottle is recylcable.'
Brian Palmer on Johnnie Walker Red Label: 'Keep Walking. That's what I'll do the next time I see it in a bar.'
Simon Godfrey on isle of Jura 10yo: 'I wouldn't even use it to power the lawn mower.'
Bill Buchan on Sheep Dip: 'Sheep Dip by name, sheep dip by nature... Yeuchh..'
Keith Bourgeois on Speyburn 10yo: 'The smell of turpintine and the taste of shoe polish.'
Daniel Bond on Edradour 10yo: 'How did they make this? Burn gummibears and dissolve them in gasoline?'
Henk Daalmeijer on J&B: 'It keeps you smiling all night because it pulls your gums back over your teeth.'
Harry Butler on Old Smuggler: 'Its singular redeeming quality is the finish that vanishes within seconds.'
Wendy Morgenstern on Loch Dhu 10yo: 'This stuff is like licking an ashtray.'
David Means on Loch Dhu 10yo: 'Needs no water. What it really needs is to be poured down the nearest sink.'
Christos Sigalas on Tullibardine 10yo: 'It's like licking Wembley's Arena green grass. Good only for drunk hooligans.'
W. Ripley on Mekong: 'Never drink anything that only gets a lukewarm recommendation from an Australian infantryman!'
S. Godfrey on Tobermory: 'While Tobermory may be a fine name for a womble, as a whisky it should be avoided at all costs.'
Please bear in mind that only one Scotch single malt I ever tasted (Loch Dhu 10yo) scores below your average bottom shelf blend like Johnnie Walker Red Label or William Lawson's. The other Scotch single malts on te Shit List generally score in the 40's (meaning I'm experiencing mild discomfort) and 50's (meaning I enjoy them - but just barely). Two distilleries that keep popping up in this section of my Hit List are Loch Lomond and the generically named 'Speyside' distillery. I haven't tried anything remotely decent from these distilleries yet. Edradour had a moment of weakness around the turn of the millennium, but they seem to be on the right track again. Some mildly peated 'Ledaig' bottlings have kept me from writing off Tobermory alltogether, but I'm not likely to try a young Tobermory OB again.
If you're really interested in exploring the nether regions of the whisky world, check out the Deviant Drams page.
It contains information on all the 'other' types of whisky (blends, vatted malts, grain
whiskies) from Scotland, 'foreign' whiskies (Ireland, Canada, USA, Australia, Germany, France, India, etc.) and all sorts of other alcoholic beverages. Some of them reach the same level of character and complexity as a single malt whiksy,
but sadly enough many of them don't...
Everybody that's NOT a sado-masochist should just consult the Hit List.
So, you are one of those sick freaks who couldn't resist clicking on the 'Shit List' button, are you?
Well all right then... Here you'll find an overview of of all Scotch single malt whiskies that provoked
me into scoring them in the 50's (seriously sub-standard, at least compared to other single malts)
or even below 50 points (which means I actively disliked them).
Please note that this Shit List is reserved for Scotch single malt whiskies.
The Deviant Drams section deals with all other types of whisky, along with other alcoholic spirits
like bourbon, rye whiskey, cognac, armagnac, calvados, grappa, rum and vodka.
Fortunately, this Shit List of 'avoidable' single malts is a lot shorter than my
Hit List.
The average single malt scores somewhere around 75 points in my book, which can be translated
as 'a very enjoyable experience'. I even find things to like in questionable malts that earn a score
in the 60's, although I wouldn't actually recommend those single malt whiskies to anybody.
When the score of a Scotch single malt whisky drops below 60 points, I feel it's something I should actively warn the
readers of Malt Madness about. Even though I still found things to enjoy in whiskies (and other spirits) that earned a
score between 50 and 59 points, for a Scotch single malt it's below par - simply not enough 'Bang-For-Your-Buck'.
Below 50 points we've arrived in the dangerzone... With so many good and affordable malts scoring
comfortably in the 70's and 80's, there's no good reason to spend your hard earned cash on material
that is not up to the usual standards. Well, actually... Sometimes an encounter with an avoidable malt
can be educational and even fun! As long as you don't over-do it, drinking a 'bad' or 'mediocre' whisky
once in a while will significantly increase your enjoyment of every halfway decent whisky that you will
taste after that. However, there are certain limits one should never exceed. Sampling a few drops of
the infamous Loch Dhu depicted at the right will disable your taste buds for the rest of the evening...
So, make sure to avoid the Loch Dhu (a.k.a. 'Aqua Crematoria') if you have the chance...
As you can see, the Shit List below is refreshingly short compared to the Hit List with my personal favorites.
By now there are hundreds of (highly) recommendable and stellar single malt whiskies on the Hit List and only a few dozen
on this 'Shit List'. What's more, more than half of them are in the 50-60 points region - malts I still enjoy (a tiny little bit)...
I'm a bit of a masochist, so I don't mind punishing my nose and tastebuds every once in a while, especially if I can convince
myself that torturing myself served some kind of greater purpose. Well, in a way it does - if my tasting a sub-standard malt and
reporting on it prevents even just one person from foolishly picking up a bottle in the store, the greater good was served...
So, please let me know about any 'disaster drams' that I may have missed...
